New Mommy Files, Part 7

Little Raine is five months old today. She has two new teeth coming in and everything! It's been a short five months. Within a five-month period I've had my maternity leave, gone back to work and in general adjusted to this new life. But the time is going by so fast. Two teeth today, college tomorrow. I'm more worried about myself than I am about her when it comes to this flying time. When you have a little one looking up to you, it puts the heat on to be the best you that you can be. I feel far from that.

Especially having a little girl—you just want her to grow up and be the bomb. And I know I am going to be the first person she looks to for the blueprint. So I don't know how much longer I can go through my days not leading the life that I know I'm supposed to be living. You know that nagging feeling you have that something else is out there for you? I've dragged my feet before but now it seems almost criminal.

The challenge? Finding the time to clear my head enough to let my thoughts gather. You know the robot I talked about a few entries back? It's still happening. But I'm going to try to shake it off—between spending a total of 13 hours a day getting to work, working and getting home from work. Children really do make you aware of time. All you new mommies, let's try to use the minutes wisely.

There was a tip I wanted to share with you today but I can't for the life of me remember! My mind has really gone to mush lately. The memory is fading fast. As soon as I remember I'll share it. Well, it's time to give Raine a bath and hopefully get her to sleep.

Marcia Caster
Senior Editor, Beauty and Fashion